As you all now know, Sian and I have been busy getting everything ready to leave Barbados and come back to freezing cold Blighty for some well needed holiday time. We can’t wait.
So when we woke up last Thursday morning, a little groggy from our anniversary drinks the night before, I was finishing up all the boring chores I had to do before we left; one of which was taking the bottles back that we had accumulated over the last few weeks.
I am not a patient man at the best of times, but rest assured, after waiting forty minute for the &$*#(@ bellend to turn up to the place, (which I was assured would be open at 9am) I was then told by said delinquent that they were not taking the 84 Banks beer bottles I had bought as they did not have any trays.
After threatening to leave the bottles where the sun doesn’t shine, the guy quickly recognised my ‘Bajan Rage’ and realised this was a battle he wouldn’t win.
I got back to the house at half eleven in a particularly bad mood, and tried to help Sian with the packing. Me trying to help Sian with the packing is like asking an excitable dog to help with the washing up. I make a lot of mess, get easily distracted, and nine times out of ten I end up carrying something in my mouth.
So, imagine Sian’s relief when this guy wandered into our kitchen.
I spotted him walking up the wall, and I asked (an incredibly relieved) Sian if she would mind if I took photos of the cricket rather than pack up. She nodded enthusiastically, and as I popped my macro lens on and primed my flash, I am sure I heard a sigh of relief as the pair of socks I had been carrying around in my gob fell to the floor with a soggy flop.
As I got closer, I was amazed at just how leaf like the crickets look; every vein, every (scale?) screams chlorophyl full, photosynthesis fuelled plant rather than insect murdering, noise making insect. He was awesome.
And also, as all these critters seem to be, a fantastic model.
Thanks for reading guys, lots of tales from Blighty to follow!